jacqcrisis:

Put salt in your baked goods. Put salt in your desserts. Just do it. Please. Salt isn’t just for savory, it’s literally a flavor enhancer so even a pinch can take a meh recipe to one people can’t stop eating. Listen to me. Your cookies and cheesecake bars are bland and uninteresting. I’m taking your hand. I’m guiding you with a gentle touch to the back. We can do this together. Trust me.

phantomrose96:

papayatayto:

phantomrose96:

phantomrose96:

phantomrose96:

“Pan-Asian does not mean pansexual Asian” -14 year old kid in class today, explaining to his friend why he is in the Pan-Asian club

It was even funnier tuning in halfway to this conversation because the first part I heard was the friend asking if the kid was pretending to be gay in order to put the Pan-Asian club on his resume

Just like bipoc…

I M LEVITATING IS THAT NOT WHAT BIPOC EANS

buddy…..

derinthescarletpescatarian:

stardustedknuckles:

bigfatgingernerd:

anarcho-gunman:

crazy-brazilian:

I sent this to my dad, who’s been a boiler tech for 30 years.

“Of the two ways you can explode a boiler, that’s the best one” isn’t the comfort your father thinks it is

random-meme-bot:

charlesoberonn:

the-text-party:

chaos–themralds:

tmmyhug:

o/ <- person waving

o7 <- person saluting

ol <- person raising hand

o1 <- person scratching head

\o> <- person stretching

\o/ <- woohoo!

<o> <- EXTREME STRESS, LIKE “OH FUCK OH SHIT” STRESS

I interpret <o> as this

<o> ∆ <- Levitating Pizza

musicalhell:

tropesarenotbad:

danandphilnews:

[image description: a printed out flyer with the picture of a sleeping grey tabby cat on it. It has text on it that reads:

Muffin disclaimer

So you’ve ordered a muffin! We hope you’re up for a challenge.

Our wobbly tabby cat Bea REALLY likes muffins so there are a few things to be aware of if you have a muffin in the cat area.

- She WILL climb you to try and get your muffin
- She is not very good at climbing so she will claw her way up your body
- It WILL hurt
- She WILL NOT give up
- She may try to eat the muffin right out of your mouth
- She is not allowed to eat muffins

You may pick her up / move her away if needed and if you’re really struggling, come and talk to us and we will help. No matter how much she wants to, it is still very important that you don’t let her eat any muffin as it will make her sick.

Good luck and we hope you enjoy your muffin experience!

She may look sweet and innocent but we promise you she’s not

/end image description]

Bea the muffin thief has come upon my timeline again and I am obliged to reblog.

apas-95:

im gonna leave my sticks here. nobody touch them ok

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demonicae:

dancinbutterfly:

unashamedly-enthusiastic:

spaceshipsandpurpledrank:

‘yeah it’s made with love, not skill’

this. is so fucking cute.

‘its made with love, not with skill’ that is ADORABLE

cheekedupwhiteboy:

gunsandfireandshit:

jethroq:

aspirationatwork:

doorstoplord:

Hey y’all wanna see the worlds most appropriately unhinged phantom of the opera as it came up on my FYP?

[Video Description: a TikTok by lefantomedelopera of The Phantom of the Opera with the caption “watch for the phantom 👀”.

A group of ballerinas and one ballerino, all dressed in white ballet outfits, are dancing to a soft but whimsical song.

Without warning, the Phantom swings across the stage on a rope while yelling loudly. This causes the dancers to startle and the audience to laugh.

End Description.]